Secrets
by ritafreeman
Summary: a story carrying on from last Saturdays episode
1. Chapter 1

"I prefer the secrecy, Keeps thing exciting." The words rung in her head, Surely he couldn't want things to be like that?, Sure in the beginning it had been fun, But it had been over 2 months now Zoe and Dixie knew so why couldn't the others? She just couldn't understand. Walking back into the pub she sat down next to Robyn, Lofty and Louise.

Looking around for Rita he saw her sitting next to the others, Seeing as the table was full he sat next to Dixie, a few moments later he glanced over trying to get her attention, Having no luck he texted her phone, replying back she told him she wasn't up for tonight after brushing him off and saying her goodbyes, she headed off.

"You not going with her?" Spoke Dixie.

"She's not up for tonight, Not what she said earlier though." He replied looking bemused.

"Say no more, I do not need to know what you get up to in your free time." She replied shuddering at the thought that crossed her mind.

"I think i'll finish this pint, Then go see her and see what's up." He replied sighing.

Sipping the last of his pint he said his goodbyes heading out of the door in direction of Rita's house.

Taking a deep breath before knocking, He stood there unsure on what to say or do it was now or never ringing the doorbell he stood back waiting a few moments before hearing the door lock being opened to reveal a saddened Rita standing there.

"What do you want Iain? Are you sure nobodies watching?" She replied sarcastically.

"Huh?" He replied bemused, Before adding "Can i come in?"

"Suppose so,"

Moving out of the way she let him passed closing the door as he went passed.

Sitting down on the sofa he sighed, "Want to tell me whats up, Why did you have a pop at me?"

"Are you serious?, Don't you understand? She replied exasperated.

"Don't you get i don't want to be your little secret anymore, i don't get you one minuet you kiss me in reception then the next minuet you want us to be a secret which is it? You can't do this to me Iain." she replied annoyed.

"I thought its what you wanted?" He replied.

"At first its fun, but when we've been going out for 2 months its not, i'm happy for it to be in the open, Its getting boring making excuses just so i can sneak off with you, I shouldn't have to do that, I don't want to do that." She replied sighing.

"I'm not sure what to say, I really thought you just wanted stay a secret for a while longer, Guess i fucked up there." He replied looking down.

"Maybe, Possibly." She replied smirking,

"Your having fun with this aren't you?" He replied pretending to be hurt.

"Could say so." She replied laughing.

"So we'll tell people soon as then."

"Yeah, that would be good, they'll have to know soon enough anyway."

"Why?" He replied confused.

"I think I'm pregnant."


	2. Chapter 2

Getting up from the sofa jumping slightly from shock, He replied "You think?, Or know?"

"Well i haven't taken a test yet, But I've got all the symptoms." She replied casually.

"So you decide to tell me when you not 100% per cent sure, Thats great." He replied slightly annoyed.

"Well i told you because i really need someone right now and thought maybe it'd be you got that wrong though didn't i?" She replied standing up heading in direction of the kitchen. "Your just like mark."

"Oh, So now your comparing me to Paedophile ex husband, Very low even for you." He replied getting angry.

"What it's true, When i told him he freaked told me if i was i should abort he wasn't ready for kids, Little did i know he was having sex with his school pupil did i? Is that it have you got someone on the side? What if I'm not pregnant and its something else? I just thought my 'Boyfriend' Would be there considering if i am, That he played apart of this, I'm scared Iain and you don't seem to give a fuck.

You know what just go, When i find out i'll let you know and you can decide what you want to do but i know what thing I'm not letting another man tell me i can't have my baby."

"Rita…."

"No Iain you've made it perfectly clear, Please just go."

Sighing and banging the wall in frustration he turned to leave slamming the door behind him.

He'd leave it to cool for few days he decided it would be the best option given the current situation.

Sighing she sat down on the chair tears beginning to fall, Why did her life have to be so crap?

She had always wanted children and when it didn't happen with mark she had been devastated, So much so she had ended up in a psychiatric ward as she had gotten so depressed she tried to kill herself because the thought that she had killed her baby haunted her so much she couldn't take it anymore, That she thought jumping off a building and being pronounced dead was the best way forward, till a stranger a good friend now helped her out from the brink when no one else cared, She got admitted later that day and and spent 2 weeks there, with very few visitors Mark came when he felt like or rather when he was 'shagging' the young teen, Her parents had never really liked mark so they stayed away and with the stigma attached friends had stayed away some sending cards but what use were they? unless they could go back in time for her and get her baby back then what use were the stupid cards?

After everything that had happened and mark had been jailed even though she lied for him in the hope that just maybe they could work things out and be family like she dreamed, She left and started her journey at holby.

what was she going to do?


	3. Chapter 3

Sighing at the clock it was three am she would have to get up at 6, But sleep wasn't on her mind, Thoughts were racing in her mind she kept trying to reason with herself that things would be ok Iain or no Iain, So seeing as sleep wasn't an option she decided to get herself ready and head to the local 24 hour shop, She could of done it at the hospital but the results could get in the wrong hands something she didn't want, Pulling on her hoody she shut the door braving the cold she walked west in direction the local 24 hour shop.

Iain on the other hand was lying in the bed thinking about how much he could of fucked things up, Why did she feel so strongly about this? Had something happened? He needed to talk to her today and seeing as he wasn't working till the afternoon he'd try to get some sleep and go to the hospital before his shift started to talk to her.

After arriving home an pulling her hoodie off, She walked up the stairs and into the bathroom following the instructions on the box, To wait 3 minutes to find out the result which either way would change her life, The anticipation for the three minuets to end were high, Looking at the test a wave of emotions hit her like a ton of bricks….. She was pregnant, Planting the test in her handbag she headed in direction of Iain's house.

Iain awoke to the sound of loud knocking on the door, Who would be knocking this early in the morning?

"Alright, Alright, I'm coming!"

"Rita,?"

"Here you wanted to know, Well now you know." She replied throwing the test at him and pushing past him to let herself in and walking through to the living room.

Looking at the test he felt a wave of anxiety hit him, He was going to be a dad, Could her be a dad? What did he have to offer?

"I thought you deserved to know, Even though you decided you don't want to be a part of this last night."

"I never said that, But i was shocked, Shocked that at some point possibly in the next nine months i'm going to have to grow up and be a fatherly figure how can i do that when I've never had one? What could i possibly give to this child Reet's? I'm scared that i'll fuck this child's life up before it's even born, Or that i'll end fucking your life up too, I've never had a relationship like this, We've been together 2 months, It's just i thought if this even happened we'd have been together a bit longer you know? It's great i suppose some part of me I've wanted kids, But i'm scared shitless Reet's."

"I'm scared too, Last time i had this opportunity Mark took it away and made me get an abortion, Told me that it was too soon and that if i did he'd leave me, And didn't want him to go as i'd sacrificed my family and friends for him, He knew and that's how he manipulated me, So much so i ended up in a psych ward for trying to kill myself, And in the 2 weeks spent there he came twice to see me, He didn't give a fuck to busy 'shagging' the teen he was seeing from school, Thats why i kicked off last night i needed someone and i didn't want someone to dictate when and what i choose to do in my life," She replied wiping the tears.

"Oh Reet's, Come here." He gestured for her to take solace in his arms.

"You know what fuck how scared i am, We're going to do this,

We're going to have a family."


	4. Chapter 4

"You sure you want to do this?" She replied checking for the 500th time that day, After composing themselves Rita had headed to work a large grin plastered on her face, Iain didn't have to be in till later, So he had made the most of the time he had left so he had a few hours kip.

"Positive, we've gone over this, haven't we?" He replied reassuring her.

"Yeah, Sorry i keep asking, Just keep having to tell me self it is." She replied smiling,

Suddenly springing apart when the sound of Robyn's voice was heard shouting Rita, The office door opened to reveal a confused Robyn.

"Yes, Robyn,?"

"Oh yes, We need you on a case ten minuets, Hi Iain,"

"Alright," He spoke.

"I'll be along in a minute."

"Sure," She replied not convinced.

Walking out of the door, She spotted Louise.

"You'll never guess what i've just seen….."

"No, I don't think so, I would of known." Replied Louise.

"But, We'll get it out of them." Spoke Robyn.

"Yep, Here She comes act natural."

"Lets go Robyn…"

"So pal, How did it go last night?"

"Alright, turns out she was feeling under the weather," He replied lying through his teeth.

"Ahh, Luckily it weren't you then.."

"Yeah.."

The day was nearly over, The staff and Iain and Dixie were standing in reception, Rita and Lofty being the last out, He knew what he was going to do walking up to her he took hold of her hand walking off kissing her forehead, The others pretty much looked shocked, Zoe and Dixie commented how it taken them so long.

"You knew and didn't tell me?" Spoke Robyn to the pair.

"Well, friendship and trust and all that." Spoke Dixie.

They hadn't been in the pub that long and Rita was beginning to feel tired, After they had a few drinks, They upped and headed home it didn't take Rita long before she headed off into a deep slumber, Iain by her side.

As the morning arose, They both laid in seeing as the didn't have to be in today, They had this day for a while and had decided to see where they took them, But instead deiced to see if they could get a midwife's appointment instead, After waking up around 9'ish she had managed to get an appointment at 2'o clock, This appointment would be a dating scan to tell when she conceived, Due etc. Both of the pair nervous as hell they decided to take a walk into town and grab something to eat before they went.

"Table for 2 please," Spoke Iain to the waiter.

"If you'd like to follow me…., Now if you want anything give us a shout ok?"

"Thank' You."

Sensing the Anxiousness coming from Rita who hadn't said much today, He took her hand into his, Telling her things would be alright, And then moving onto something funny that had happened at the ambulance station last week, But she wasn't listening not really she was so deep in her thoughts about today, She was scared something was going to go wrong even though she had reassurance from Iain nothing seemed to be helping, Because of this she hardly ate and wasn't the best person to be around,.

A few unsociable hours they were sat in the maternity ward, Anxiously waiting for the nurse to call Rita's name, "Rita Freeman, If you'd like to come with me."

"Right if i could ask you to pull your trousers down, and Lie on the bed for me and then i'll get everything ready, And then i'll ask some questions is that ok?"

"Sure,"

A couple of questions later, The midwife had determined the baby would be born late April, Seeing as she was 8 weeks and that so far everything seemed normal, But nothing compared to seeing their baby on the screen, Rita was sure Iain had welled up, Relief came from Rita finally knowing everything was as it should be, And after finishing the midwife gave Rita everything she needed and printed the pictures out which took pride in Iain's wallet.

"Told you everything would be ok didn't i?"

"Yeah but just hearing and seeing made it all so much more real," She replied smiling.

"Does it feel more strange now that you know that there is a tiny human growing inside of you?" He asked curious.

"Some-What yes, But comforting knowing its actually real, Does that make sense?"

"Yeah… So when can we tell people?"

"Soon, It's still early days but if you'd like we could just tell Dixie? I'm sure she'll keep it a secret."

"Sounds like a plan!"

Walking out of the hospital they headed in direction of the ambulance station, Hand in hand.

"You better not be coming here for use of my office…." Dixie replied on seeing them walk in laughing.

"Don't worry, Were not we have news," Spoke Rita Laughing at the memory.

"Don't tell me your leaving? None's ill are they?" Spoke dixie concern in her voice.

"Nah, We would like to congratulate you on becoming Aunt Dixie." He smiled puling the picture from his wallet.

"Your having me on aren't you?"

"Nope, It's really happening.." Spoke Rita grinning.

Realising it was true after staring at the picture in Iain's hand, She Hugged the pair tears welling up, "I'm so happy for you,Don't worry i'll keep it to myself,

Drinks later?"


	5. Chapter 5

The rest of the day was spent at the comfort of Rita's home, They had decided to live there When the baby was born as Iain's house wasn't big enough for the three of them compared to Rita's anyway, After doing a few job's it was time to go back out and meet the others at the pub, Something that didn't seem a great experience for Rita anymore she wasn't allowed to drink and there she was sitting in a roomful of people drinking, It was her version of hell.

"My round." Spoke Noel.

"I think so, You copped out last time." Spoke Louise.

"What do you want guys?" He spoke looking directly at Rita and Iain.

"Pint for me, I'll have a coke please." Spoke Iain and Rita at the same time.

"You alright?" Spoke Robyn and Louise.

"Yes, Why wouldn't i be?" Spoke Rita defensive.

"We was only asking."

"Sorry, I think i'm tired." She replied sheepishly.

Looking at Iain she spoke, "I'm going to go home, Forget the drink you can say though i'll see you at home."

"Nah, It's ok I'll come home with you," Turning to look at Noel at the bar he spoke. "Forget the drinks mate, Were heading home."

"See you later guys," Spoke the pair putting their jackets on before heading out of the door.

"You know they'll figure out sooner or later, Might as-well tell them soon,"

"Maybe tomorrow, Or next week, I want to tell Connie and Charlie first, Ok? She replied kissing him gently.

"Thats fine what ever you want y'lady."

"Please, Stop it with the accent,"

"Alright, Alright,"

Upon getting home they had gotten themselves a hot drink and settled on the sofa watching tv, Rita was nodding off and Iain was trying to get the remote from her hand so he could turn off, "The reality TV." that he hated with a passion.

After semi watching TV and checking his phone it was quite late nearly 11, So he decided to gently wake Rita up, She startled from her peaceful sleep to see Iain staring over her, Getting up from the sofa she walked into the kitchen getting a cold drink to take up to bed and then climbed the stairs into the bedroom getting undressed and ready for bed, Iain doing the same.

After doing their nightly routine, They headed into dreamland sleeping through to 6 the next morning when the alarm went off, Causing Iain to jolt upright and almost throw the alarm clock in annoyance that he had to get up.

After getting ready they headed out of the door where the walk to work was quick, Rita arrived at 7 placing everything in her locker ready to start work, She decided to head to Connie's office first to tell her the news grabbing Charlie on the way so she could kill two birds with one stone.

"What can we do for you Nurse Freeman,?"

"Let me have my maternity leave in 5 months?" She replied happily.

"Really, Your expecting,?"

"Yep,,"

"I Take it Iain knows?" Asked Connie.

"Your with Iain?" Spoke charlie.

"Keep up," She replied laughing. "It's cause your to involved with Connie and Jacob."

"Maybe….." He replied. "Come here." He spoke pulling her in for a congratulations hug.

"Well," Spoke Connie "That shouldn't be a problem, We'll have Charlie and the new band 6 nurse," Congratulations, Who else knows?"

"Just you two and Dixie, Iain couldn't keep it any longer After the scan yesterday,"

"I bet, How far gone are you?" Spoke Charlie.

"8 weeks, I want to wait and tell the others, But i wanted to tell you incase Something happened at work etc, Well i better be getting back its manic."

"Thanks Charlie, Connie."


	6. Chapter 6

"So you spoke to them?" Asked Iain.

"Yep, All been sorted, Another two people happy for us, It's nice to have people happy for us, Never had that with mark it's strange but a nice strange." She replied reminiscing.

Sensing they were being heard the conversation ended abruptly with "We'll tell them later?" From Rita.

A few hours later and things had settled and the E.D wasn't as busy as it had first been patients had been seen fairly quickly and been moved on to wards, although Rita had started to feel tired and less motivated se tired her hardest not to show any sign of what she considered weakness, So she carried on rushing around like a headless chicken when all the sudden she became dizzy, head spinning she held onto the side rail trying to shake the dizziness off but failing to do so before falling to the ground and hitting her head on the way, heading into darkness.

"Rita, Rita can you hear me, It's me Lofty and Robyn."

"She's out of it she must of hit her head pretty hard, let's get her onto the trolley and into resus, Then go get Connie and Charlie alright Robyn?"

"Roger that, Come on Rita wake up for us?"

Getting her onto the trolley and into resus Connie and Charlie were called, rushing into resus they see Rita's unconscious body laying on the bed, upon what she had told them earlier, they needed to check if she was going on, and then check on the baby, Respecting her wishes of not letting the others know until she felt confident, In the meantime Iain had been told and had came rushing into resus, panic stricken that it was something really serious, Dixie lagging behind waiting outside with a small group of others.

Holding her hand, He spoke gently "Reet's, Come on wake up, You've got us worried now,"

"We need to go now there's a space for the Head CT, Look Iain why don't you wait here with Dix, And you'll see her when she's out? She wouldn't want you stressed out would she?" Spoke charlie sensing Iain was starting to struggle.

"Please look after her," Spoke Iain quietly kissing her head.

"Baby…" Spoke Rita croakily out of nowhere, Struggling to keep her eyes open.

"Have you any pain Rita?" Spoke Connie.

"No, I'm laying on the bed for the sake of it." She joked before adding "Ow, Back of my head It's throbbing."

"Right 500mg of paracetamol to start of with Robyn, Rita we need to take you for a Head CT Ok?"

"And don't you try and argue, Alright?" Spoke Iain.

"I don't think i can, Can someone sit me up a bit please?" Noticing Robyn had gone over to the other side of the room, Grabbing Connie's attention she Pointed to the ever so slightly bump, With Connie replying "After the CT."

After the CT was done and there appeared to be no damage, Rita was put in a side bay to rest, Maternity were called down and Relief left the room as the midwife deemed everything was perfectly fine, Just a few words that she should rest more and not run around as much, suggesting that light duties and paperwork may be a good option, Connie had suggested that she stay overnight and put onto a drip and so they could monitor the head, With Rita still out of it it was in her best interest much to her disagreeance.

"Right were off Shall we go and say bye to Rita and Iain?" Spoke Robyn. "I'll see if the need anything, although he probably got her suff right?" Replied Robyn rambling on, Causing the others to laugh.

hearing a knock on the door Iain spoke "Reet's do you want visitors, Or do you want me to go out and tell them your not up to it?"

"Let them in, Like you said they need to know sometime, And what better time then when I'm half out of it." She replied chuckling.

"Alright you lot you can come in,"

"Rita, How you doing? Feeling better?" Spoke Louise.

"Getting there,"

"Did they find out what caused it? dehydration? low blood pressure?" Spoke lofty concerned.

"Well they didn't have to tell me i already knew, I mean we already knew." Replied Rita.

Sensing she was getting tired of talking, Iain replied "We're expecting a baby in around 7 months, Hence why this one here had a dizzy spell earlier."

"It's true, Show them the pic, pic, picture Iain," She replied half stuttering her words, and getting confused.

upon hearing the words coming out of the pair mouths, Robyn went crazy, Dylan muttered a somewhat awkward congratulations, Lofty nearly fell over his own feet trying to hug the pair, causing Dylan to comment that lofty shouldn't hold the baby, causing everyone to laugh, Everyone else in the room were happy for them, Each offering babysitting duties, It wasn't long before Rita's eyes were heavy and she was half asleep, causing them to leave and head to the pub or home.

Laying next to her in the bed hands around her stomach, He muttered a "I love you," Before heading into dreamland himself.

What a day…


End file.
